A time to laugh a time to cry a time to dream a time to die, this is where my world ends where the laughter and joy is pretend, there is nothing here but an empty shell locked inside its on special hell.I turn my head left and right and wonder what there is for me to fight, does it matter as I sit here now that the only one who can hear me is the cow, that looks back in the mirror, screaming crying wanting to die this is her answer this is her life answers wont come easily it seems for the lonely heart with shattered dreams, lost in the haze of the day as one moves into another there is no way to recover tormented and painful the laughter is dead there is nothing left nothing to be said Do I want to die, yes and I want to cry and I want to laugh and I want to dance but I will never get that chance because there is only darkness in this place only loneliness that I face when the time comes and the spirit is released there will not even then be a semblance of peace because of what is unsaid and what is undone. I think about those I love and I wonder am I being fair why should anyone care about the beast I have become, laughter is not answering dreams are dying and there is no hope as I sit here crying. Weak and sad alone and mad the shell is all that I am now not even my soul can scream and howl. I beg release from this life as the slow slicing blade of a knife destroys flesh and tears vein ripping away the tears that stain. Tomorrow will be better they say, my tomorrows seem to be the same Dark and lonely without hope and dreams the only one who understands is so busy, to busy it seems.